How Not to Eat a Pineapple

Beautiful pineapple #7.

This was still delicious, but I cannot recommend eating one this way. Best to skin it first. And that green top is not that tasty, it's kind of pokey.


Also, this morning, I had a mango that was so good, that I thought perhaps it was a trap, like a mango Trojan Horse. As I ate deeper into it, I thought perhaps there might be a bunch of bees in the middle, or a radioactive pit designed to, I don't know...somehow take me down, maybe take down the whole human race. It was that sweet, that perfectly ripe that had I eaten perhaps five minutes earlier or later, I wouldn't be writing this now. But it was so good, I didn't see it as just a fruit, but something more...something evil.


Also, I am looking for a replacement for almonds and raisins. I am eating too much of them. I love them too much, and am afraid I will soon be somehow punished for it.


Life with a lot of fruit is not all that it's cracked up to be.